PastPoop

4/24/2003-Combat Monkeys

That's what this world needs.

Nations of the world, settle your disputes with gun weilding primates!

It would be like battlebots, only better, cause you wouldn't have that "No projectile" rule that they have. Man, that's so stupid. They disqualified my bot cause it was an RC car with a berlinelli 12 gauge duct-taped to it. I coulda had that golden nut, no problem! But noooooo! And I also got banned from entering any other bots because I kicked one of the announcers, but that fucker ate my sandwich!

Anyways.

I think a good start would be with these examples:

This is a fine example of a monkey shock trooper. Yes, she has only one gun, but look at the assload of ammo she has! This monkey can lay down a spray of cover fire that should cut trees, cars, and medium size elephants in half.

For those who feel that we need a little more umph here's an example of a tomahawk monkey:

These primates can infiltrate enemy territory and deploy explosive flavored goodness at a moments notice.

One must remember that hand to hand combat is a must. Thus our combat monkeys will be taught the Martial Arts.

As you can see, this man stands no chance.

Okay, time for my medicine.

-BarnyardMessiah