PastPoop

5/20/2003-Yes, Masturbating Is Bad For You.

It may not make you go blind, but it sure as hell makes you numb. At least when you're seeking the sexual comfort of a camgirl who's only job is to lure you into paying $29.95 to see prerecorded models playing with their photoshopped vaginas. To see what I mean, click here.

This is a bit of an addendum to Barnyard's previous article on this topic. I went to the craptacular webcam chat he mentioned and found a bunch of pud pulling momma's boys who cannot comprehend basic text. Let me list what this particular chat is for, and what will and won't be done there:

1: No Nudity. The girls will NOT strip, their only purpose is to talk to you while you watch, them and blurt out the occasional plug for their lame ass site.
2: They do NOT do requests. See above. Even after all this, these retards still ask for bra free funbags and a view of the birth canal. Idiots.
3: They will NOT go on cam with you. Simple, but requests for this are barked out every ten seconds.
4: They are not sexy by any means. Probably opinion, but these trailer queens are straight out of Arkansas. Lawn ornaments can be viewed with paid subscription.

Aside from this, there's another great source of stupidity that attracts to this chat. Frenchies and their bastard children, French Canucks. The following is a dialogue war done this very evening against a third rate snail eater from Quebec. This is word for word, and solidifies even further my dislike of Frenchies and internet spankmeisters. I am "munkieluvsu," and the Quebecian asshat is "guest1907187," which i'll abbreviate as "frog". My abbreviation will be "munkie."

munkie: you're a douchbag guest, you smell of frog or brazilian.
frog: stupid americans always think dumb people are from france or brazil, learn your latin languages stupid.
munkie: so you are from brazil.
frog: no, i'm from quebec.
munkie: AHAHAHAHAHA! A THIRD RATE FROG!
frog: you know nothing. if you americans weren't so busy bothering other countries, maybe you'd see how dumb you are.

Interlude: At this point every American in the room begins laying abuse on this cheese eating creep, and i'm unable to post due to lag time for nearly three minutes. Let this be a warning, do not piss off masturbating Americans. It's just rude.

frog: france has a beautiful and diverse culture. we're responsible for major achievements.
munkie: like the bidet.
*room floods with laughter*
frog: no like art, music and fashion design.
munkie: all french designers are homos. nuff said.
frog: yes, but it's still an art you arrogant bastards lack.
munkie: ever hear of tommy hilfiger? p.diddy gansta wear? we know our fashion buttpellet.
frog: you're merely reaffirming american stupidity munkie.
munkie: and you're still french.
frog: munkie les enfant terribles.
munkie: someone has played their metal gear solid. too bad you didn't learn how to win wars from it.
frog: here we go with french defeatism.....
munkie: you said it.
frog: we have won wars, but we never liked starting them.
munkie: exactly, you call everyone else to clean up so you can get back to painting awful postcards and buttraping swedish boys.
frog: you have a distorted view of french culture.
munkie: jerry lewis, cheese souffle enemas, unfinished erector set monuments, and askew nipple porn.
frog: you're an idiot.
munkie: back to the war thing... vietnam, w.w.I, and II, franco-prussian war....
frog: vietnam was an accident, and the two world wars we were abandoned by the british.
munkie: reread your books pal, you got KNOCKED THE FUGG OUT!
frog: quit reading american propaganda. we won both wars.
munkie: cause of us.
munkie: we also finished up vietnam for you.
frog: you lost stupid!
munkie: we had some help from paris with that. but you started that shit, and i thought you didn't make war.
frog: we had colonial interest there.
munkie: you tried to prove you could start shit and win, but ended up getting stomped, so you called uncle sam. again.

This a lot more to this chat, and I will post the rest tomorrow. Seems I got a little off topic with the whole Frenchie thing, but it goes to show you... these chats attract the cellar dwellers of humanity. Hence, I now haunt there merely for the entertainment of pissing on those who aren't me.

-Insidious_T